The Sin of Un-Forgiveness

By Carmen Schroeder

“Then the master summoned
his servant and said,
`You wicked servant! I
forgave you all that
debt just because you
begged me to do it.
Shouldn't you have had
pity on your fellow servant,
just as I had pity on you?'"
Matthew 18:32-33

he picture of the love of Christ is shown to us in 1 Corinthians 13:5, which reads: "Love...keeps no record of wrongs." Recently I did an Internet search on two words “UN-FORGIVENESS ROTS” and 264 articles popped up.

One Mary T. Sweat of Kansas City, Missouri, had this to say in the Journal of Christian Nursing:

"A pastor said that when (he was) first ordained, he felt that 50% of the problems he encountered were the consequences of un-forgiveness.”

“After 10 years in ministry, he revised his estimate to between 75% and 80%. After 20 years, he concluded that 90% of all problems were rooted in un-forgiveness; is recognizing and helping patients experiencing un-forgiveness an important component of spiritual care? “

Scripture states that forgiveness and the lack of it play a role in our health. For example, Proverbs 14:30 and 17:22 say that a calm and undisturbed mind and heart bring life to the body, but envy, jealousy, wrath (what we feel when we harbor un-forgiveness) rots the bones (literally the body)."

Why do you think that is? Why does the act of un-forgiveness (and it is an unrighteous act) bear down so hard upon our bodies? Why is it such a detrimental cancer robbing us from the peace and joy we long for?

Un-forgiveness is sin. It is not part of God's nature in us - the new nature. Un-forgiveness quenches the Spirit of God within. And that, my friends, is why we cannot hold onto His peace and joy while succumbing to an unforgiving spirit.

“For no good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly” (Psalm 84:11). His peace and joy flee from the Forgiven yet Unforgiving person.

Let us look at the truth of sin's consequences upon our bodies.

We need to understand that just as we are made in our great God's Image - which HE is Father, Son and Holy Spirit - we, too have been given three parts - body, mind (soul) and spirit!

Here are three additional reasons (other than 'Daddy said so!') to forgive the transgressions of others:

1. Un-forgiveness shows distrust in the LORD. Unforgiving Children of God do not really believe that '”vengeance is HIS and HE will SOON repay.” These folks believe at their core that the LORD does, in fact, short-change His children (Romans 12:14-21).

2. Un-forgiveness divides your own heart (mind), which has direct harmful consequences on both your body and eventually your spirit as previously mentioned. A divided mind/heart is at unrest, lacking peace, full of anxiety and often expresses itself in anger.

Let us remember Psalm 86:10-12: “For You are great and do wondrous deeds; You alone are God. Teach me Your way, O LORD; I will walk in Your truth; Unite my heart to fear Your name. I will give thanks to You, O Lord my God, with all my heart, And will glorify Your name forever.”

3. Un-forgiveness blinds your spiritual eyes. When praying the LORD's prayer with an unforgiving heart, do you really want Him to not forgive you in the same manner as you have not forgiven others?

So are we off the hook if our transgressor(s) never admits to their transgression, never asks for forgiveness, or just does not care at all about our feelings? Christ, as always, is the example.

Both Jesus (having just been nailed to the Cross) in Luke 23:34 and Stephen (as they were stoning him) in Acts 7:59-60 cried out, “Forgive them.” Jesus added, “… for they know not what they do.”

In conclusion, the sin of un-forgiveness is akin to “peeling scabs.” The wound can never heal if you continue peeling off the scab, the healing measure. Un-forgiveness is the reopening of old wounds. Give up your “right” to yourself and your fruitless need to hurt.

Leave the scab be. Forgive as the Great Debt-Reliever has forgiven you. In His time, His Spirit actively binds up and heals those old wounds. Scars will remain, but they will serve as a beautiful reminder to you and a living testimony to others of His healing power and faithfulness in your own life.

Walk with your head held high, dear sister, because Forgiveness (like milk) is good for the body!